Monday, February 28, 2011


In the past few years of working with college students I've seen many relationships begin (and most end). Many of the relationships are unhealthy. Much of that can be attributed to immaturity, humankind's selfish nature, or no older examples of healthy, holy, committed relationships in their lives.

If I know the students in the relationships well, I always try and talk with them. They already know what is wise. They know what the bible says. And they still make poor choices, for whatever reason. It can be discouraging to see the choices they make and then heart-breaking to see them go through so much hurt.

There's been so many situations. Couples who don't know how to communicate with each other. Or couples who date solely for physical reasons. Some have trust issues. Some don't spend enough time together and they feel neglected. Some spend time only with each other and no one else. Or maybe one half of the couple is into drinking or drugs. And in extreme cases, I've seen cheating, abuse, pregnancy, and abortions.

So today was very refreshing.

There are two college students that have been friends for awhile, and on our snow trip last month I noticed they were spending more time together. They asked if they could come talk to me today. Once we sat down, the guy looked at the girl, and then turned to me and said:

"So Sarah, I'm sure you've noticed she and I have been hanging out a lot. And you've probably guessed that we have feelings for each other. We do. And we want to pursue this. But we want to be focused on God. We really really do. We want him to be the center of this. And we want to go slow. We want to keep building on our friendship before we take things further. But we need help. We need advice. How do we stay focused on the Lord when we begin dating? How can we be encouraging each other in our faith? Where do I learn to be a spiritual leader in this relationship?"

I was shocked.

And so impressed with them.

You'd hope that this would be the norm for Christian college kids, but again, for whatever reason, it's not.

And you guys, it was SO refreshing! They want their relationship focused on God! I almost didn't even know what to say.

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